Single but do not settle?

Is this really true?

The lady I spoke with last night brought this up. She attested that this was me hiding behind something or there were some unresolved issues. It was brought up that I had been burnt before and I was hiding behind that.

Is this really the truth? Am I afraid of intimacy thus avoiding being vulnerable? To take this further, I do say "she is not X" thus I become friends instead of lovers rather than saying "lets see where this goes".

I am seriously pondering if this is a defense mechanism rather than the truth. I am now leaning towards that conclusion as the outcomes of my past relationships. It is just a thought that I'd blog about.