Right where I should be...

2009 started out with great energy. I got new floors for my house, started going on out on dates. I had new years resolutions, typed out and carried them around with me.

Did I accomplish all of them. Some but not all. That is not what this post is about however.

Early in the year I dated this girl, that ultimately made me break down and cry with my mom, in a good way. You see my relationship with my mom is not strained. However, I love my mom. She's my mom. However, in life you have to deal with accepting people for who they are. Through dating this girl, I reached out to try and re-establish a relationship with my mom. It's a work in progress as I look back on things. Regardless, I accepted her for who she is, as my mom, she has her gifts to give me. That day was a watershed moment for me. Crying with your mom on the phone is a hard thing to do, especially when when one of her gifts is not to be maternal. It is what is is. She has other gifts that she gives me and I'm good with that.

Sadly the girl never lasted for a litany of reasons that cannot be listed here. Suffice to say, that relationship had a very symbolic meaning to me and my life. Therapy is a great thing.

So, I got off topic, but the year progressed. With the explosion of Facebook in my life, my world has gotten better. This is good for me, as I am a communicator. Communication is my security blanket. If I communicate with my friends, this makes me feel more secure. It is what it is. Therefore, Facebook helps me in that aspect. It draws me closer to my friends. I think it has made my life better in a positive way.

Volleyball of course has been and will be a source of my physical activity, and yet my social network.

So, 2009 progressed, dating (more dates this year than in most other years combined), networking, my job got better and drew closer to some old friends and found some amazing new ones.

In November, I had an epiphany. I finally realized, that this is the exact spot in life where I am supposed to be. Huge moment for me as I turned 45, single and no kids. In your 40's you finally realize that you are mortal and your body changes. You realize that there is an end per se, that your body is not indestructible.

So given all the highs and lows that I've endured this year and throughout life, I am totally right where I should be. All I've been through has set me up for this next phase of my life. I am right where I should be.